Losing Weight, Gaining Strength

My journey to a healthier me via exercising, and eating less.

Archive for the category “Nutrition”

Confessions of a Lost Mama

I’m here to admit I got terribly lost. I lost my passion, my motivation, my excitement to continue on the journey.

I’m sure you have heard the term “to live in the moment.” Its a great concept and sound reminder to appreciate and treasure the life, family, and blessings you have right NOW. But, for me, it knocked me off the tracks. I stopped envisioning my goal and I started to really think one day at time. I began to let old habits fall in to place while ignoring the future consequences.

I let the daily stresses take over me. I had lots ( lots and lots ) of late night snacks. I stopped taking advantage of the daily opportunities to be active.

I used to look at those people in the media who lost a ton of weight only to gain it back a short time later and think, how could they do that! How could they get so far only to let themselves go again! I know the answer to that now, I can clearly see how it happens.

I went to bed last night thinking “what has become of me?” When did my flame burn out? When people say I inspired them I feel ashamed at the lack of progress I have made. I have been waking up most mornings hating what I’ve done the day before. I feel angry and disappointed in myself.

I’m here to release that negativity and turn it in to determination. I’m here to remember how far I HAVE come. How much I was able to accomplish. To bring my future and my goals to the forefront of my mind again and let them motivate my daily actions.

I refuse to fall back into a self-pitied, depressed, and un-happy person. I REFUSE.

The difference between the me now and the me that began this journey then, is I KNOW I am capable. How powerful, huh? I don’t need to wonder if I can do this, I know for a fact that I can. And I WILL.

I hope you haven’t given up on me…because I will never give up on myself!

Reflection

“Man must cease attributing his problems to his environment, and learn again to exercise his will – his personal responsibility.” 

Up until 5 months ago I was lying to myself. I told myself I was eating “healthy.” I told others I was “trying” to lose weight. I preached. I pretended. Why wasn’t I losing weight?

I wasn’t being honest. I was hiding from the facts. The fact is that I ate too much. I binged. I ate when I wasn’t hungry. I ate when I was bored. I ate when life was hard. I ate when life was great!

My successful progress has ultimately been based on my accountability, to myself.  When everyone is in bed, and I’m alone, I know that if I eat, even if no one is looking, it will result in weight gain.

That’s my secret. That’s my “miracle” cure. Honesty.

Over the years, nothing else worked because I wasn’t following through. I never lasted more than two weeks. I didn’t have the motivation, and I didn’t have the drive. And I lied to myself about it.

Now, in reflection, I can’t say yet what really changed me. Maybe my 30th birthday in the near future. Or my realization, now, with two children that I need to be here for my family. Being fed up with my depression and anxiety.

I just got to THAT point. Where change was necessary.

And here I am now.

Fast Lane

My progress this week was on the fast track with a total loss of 4 pounds! It was so exciting to see 165! I literally feel SO LIGHT! Not only do I feel light, but I feel healthy, and energized, and happy.

As of today I have lost 42 pounds. And, I’m proud to say these pounds were lost without any fad diets, or crazy exercise regimens. Just a lot of healthy changes that are leading me to a wonderful place in my mind and body! I’m excited about whats still ahead!

***

I’ve been making breakfast a priority lately. I just haven’t been hungry in the mornings and there are other things distracting me from eating (my 10.5 month old.) But, I’m making time for it, and my motto is ‘better late then never!’

My go to’s recently have been:

  • homemade green shake (yogurt, almond milk, spinach, berries, and honey) and toast -I use Alvarado St. Bakery Essential Flax Seed Bread – at 50 calories a slice and zero flour its my #1 bread!
  • plain FAGE greek yogurt with berries and molasses
  • scrambled eggs (1 whole egg and 2 whites), spinach, and toast, oh and hot sauce!

These meals fill my tummy and satisfy my taste buds. So, what is your go to meal in the morning?

Weighing In

Oh man, I can’t help myself! I cannot stop from weighing in. I rely on the results to keep myself accountable. I can’t live without that weekly update. It keep me honest with how I ate during the week, and how hard I worked.

That being said, I had an AMAZING week,  and the scale showed it. I worked out 4   times, and I had my eating under control. I felt great about stepping on the scale.

So, ladies and gentlemen, I present to you my 171 pound self. I have lost 36 pounds in about 4 months.

You heard right. THIRTY SIX POUNDS!

I’m half way to my goal!

Thank you everyone for the love an support!

 

Back To Business

I had a 1 lb gain this last weigh in. I was expecting it. After Thanksgiving I was having a really hard time getting my cravings and hunger under control. The sugar from the sweets has really messed with my head and body, and was leaving me thirsting for more. Throughout the week was also rough because we had not gone grocery shopping and I was surviving on the bare minimums in the pantry and freezer. The calories were probably 200-300 in excess each day. To top it off I attended a birthday party with lots of yummy food and drinks, and I didn’t really hold back in my celebrating.

I felt gross. My head ached. My body felt sluggish and bloated. I’m definitely done with that little drop off the wagon! I don’t want to feel like that again. I’ve resolved to stay off the sugars, even at celebrations and special occasions. The sugar messes me up and makes me extra hungry, grumpy, and plagued with cravings.

On Sunday we went grocery shopping and refilled our home with delicious healthy food that fills my belly and keeps me on track. I’m back to counting every calorie, and I’m feeling much more in control. I feel better about Christmas time festivities in the future because I have a strong desire to NOT feel like I did last week. I’m also going to put off weighing myself for about a month as to not get discouraged from the detour I made with my diet.

Here’s a little sample of my breakfast menu this week:

This Morning's Breakfast

TBL

Do you watch The Biggest Loser? I do. Do I love it? No, but I watch it anyways. That show has a way of pulling the ugly cry out of me. They sure love to edit the sob stories to their full potential don’ t they?

As I am on my own weight loss adventure I am wondering how many contestants gain the weight back. Of course, you only hear from people that keep it off and truly change, but what are all the other stories? I mean, duh, its easy when one is on TBL ranch to lose weight. Its their only focus, their only responsibility. They have these kick-butt trainers working them out non stop. What happens when you go home, and life kicks in? I know some contestants “get it”, and when they go home they continue with the life-skills they learned. But, its hard not to believe that some people live in this fantasy weight loss world, then get home to be shocked by reality and fall back into old habits.

There is no easy fix. There is no magic diet. Bob Harper isn’t in my face telling me to work harder, go further. That would be nice right?  I can be my own cheerleader though. I can tell myself to take one more step, eat one less bite, run one more minute. Push myself to my my so called limits, then push a little harder. Sure, I can’t work out all day, but when I do workout I can workout to my full potential. If I can be the best me, success is inevitable.

I do appreciate the message of The Biggest Loser. We need to get healthy as a society. We need to stop letting our emotions, our pasts, and other people control us and keep us from being all that we can be. We need to make the choice to change.

Like I said, I don’t LOVE the show. Some of the products they advertise are the opposite of healthy (Yoplait Light? yuck). And, I hope people watching can see the difference in being on the show and real life. But, its sure neat to see the contestants transformations and relate to their new hope in life as healthier people inside and out. I just hope it sticks!

Vegetables

Veggies. I know I need them. They are filled with vitamins and minerals. They are low in calories, and high in fiber. So, why do I have such a hard time consuming them on a regular basis? I wouldn’t call myself picky, I will try almost anything once. And, I will eat most vegetables served to me. But, eating them on daily is hard.

When I began eating healthier my main goals were no fast food, no pizza, no white flour, less sugar, etc.. Now that I am at a good place with food I would really like to incorporate more vegetables in my diet.

Fruit has been easier to stick to because its on the go food. You can just grab a plum, or orange, or banana, and be done! Veggies aren’t so simple…there’s more preparation that goes into eating them. Having an 8 month old baby that requires A LOT of attention doesn’t always give me time to make a yummy salad or steam some broccoli. I’m ready to allow time for this now though, and make eating more vegetables a priority.

We started as a family with some vegetables that we know we like. Every week we buy cucumbers, bell peppers, and butter lettuce for salads. I’m not getting tired of these, but I wouldn’t mind some variety.

So, I’m reaching out! What veggies do you incorporate into your daily/weekly nutrition? What is your favorite way to prepare them? I need some help!

 

Awareness

There has been such a difference in the awareness I have for the way my body reacts when I eat a certain way.  Now that my body is accustom to eating fewer calories as well as healthier food, when I stray, I really feel a reaction.

Last night my husband and I celebrated our 8th wedding anniversary. We went to dinner at a local Japanese restaurant. Nothing I ate was terribly unhealthy, but, I had some beer, and white rice with my steak and veggies, and topped it off with a scoop of green tea ice cream. In the past, I could of downed all that easily! But by the end of the meal I was stuffed! The next morning I was bloated, and tired, and my stomach ached. I also slept horribly!

I learned my lesson. I am okay with celebrating every once in a while, but I would rather avoid the consequences I felt this morning. So, next time, I’ll stick to smaller portions, less starch, and a small glass of wine.

It makes me wonder if I was feeling bloated, tired, and unwell before, but because I was used to the abuse, I didn’t notice..

***

In other news-today was my first day of the 30 Day Shred challenge I have given myself. There was a lot of arguing going on in my head because of the way I was feeling, but I got over it. I took my measurements, stuck in the DVD and proceeded to work my booty off. (Hopefully literally.)

 

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